Tag Archives: grief

Walks With Angels

Walks With Angels

 

Walking with angels

It is that which she does

Smiling and laughing

Filling Heaven with her love

She no longer feels

Hurt or pain

And while I may never

Feel the same

Her time here was over

She needed to rest

Knowing her was a privilege

No doubt I was blessed

No question she honored us

Each day with her smile

This angel God allowed us

 To know for a while

Like clockwork her laughter

Resounds in my ear

When I need her voice

Or just wish she was here

She whispers sweetly

“You are not alone”

I never left your heart…

My permanent home

I couldn’t ever walk

 Away from you

I would have never left…

You know it’s true

However the plans of God

Are never in vain

And while you may think

Things have changed

She went on to say…

God had plans for me

And just knowing you

Gave me wings

Please do not cry

And do not mourn

For you, too,

Will be reborn

It’s like a balmy paradise

Every single day

We smile on those we’ve met

Along the way

Please smile when I

Come to your heart

And know you have been there

From the start

Nothing so beautiful

You could ever have known

As when our Father

Calls us home

While you feel my absence

From your ear

Know that God

Will keep me near

For on your lifelong journey

Which may at times seem bleak

I will always be here by your side

With anything you seek

Don’t worry my love

And don’t feel awry

God is watching over you

And He’s right by my side

So I ask you today

Welcome joy in your heart

Knowing you may not see me…

But we are never apart

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More Than You’ll Ever Know

More Than You’ll Ever Know

Fear not my angel
Loss is not felt here
There is no crying
Over those no longer near

And don’t allow that statement
Make you feel sad or alone
There is just a warm comfort
When Our Father calls us Home

We are sad at first…of course
I wanted to call you too
There were things I wanted to say
Things I wanted to do

But the best part of it all
Is I get to watch you now
As you do all of the things
That I once talked about

You are remembering the moments
I said I wanted to go here or there
I hope you realize…I told you
Because you were the only one who cared

Now you can take that trip
Even go on a train
And I can watch and smile
Love I can’t refrain

While you may feel guilty
For doing what I wanted to do
Know that by you enjoying life
I get to enjoy life too

So smile that million dollar smile
Flash that light to the world
It reminds me how well you loved this
Insignificant girl

Not to say I wasn’t important
But I was so much more valuable to you
You wrapped me up in your love
With all you chose to do

You still do it today
Of that I am sure
Remind the world
Of a love so pure

So cry every once in a while
Tears always help life grow
But smile when you think of me
You’re loved more than you’ll ever know

The Reason For The Season

The Reason For The Season

 

  I think that sometimes we can get lost in the commercialization of things this time of year. The proof of that is everywhere we look. Every store or shop seems to have their own idea of how to make the season more festive and memorable than the year previous.

This year, however, has been a little rougher for me than most have been…which I believe is a test of my strength and willingness to submit to the will of our Creator. So I have sat and endured every Christmas cartoon known to man…I have watched store Santa’s posing with pictures of children who would rather be ducking and weaving in and out of a four lane highway. I have watched retailers attempt to make their sales and “bargains” look like what we might want Christmas to be. All of this, isn’t always a bad thing…it’s always nice to see the excitement of children and the hidden secrets that this particular holiday seems to bring.

This year was completely turned around for me…I was all ready to become “Scrooge”. And in my mind, I had reason to. Then something wonderful happened in my life…I experienced the love of God through the heart of my daughter.

First you must understand, she is a teenager…not unlike most teenagers. She wants things, and she knows that there will be things that no matter how much she wants them, or how much I wish I could get them for her…she just won’t receive them. But this brown eyed beauty decided that this year for Christmas she wanted to play Santa Claus for a child on her school’s “Angel Tree”. Keeping in mind that she knew that by us buying for another child meant that her lean Christmas list…just went on a diet. She didn’t care. I remember the day that she was talking to me about it…tears in her eyes. She just wanted to make a child happy for Christmas. And so we went shopping for this sweet 2 year old boy that she didn’t know and would never meet. We got him a few things…which she picked out. She went home and wrapped them and placed them in a giant gift bag and took them to school.

I can not even begin to express to you the joy that I felt through her at that moment. But I can only really think of one comparison which may assist in my lack of descriptive prose. Watching her was like the feeling I would get as a young child coming in from the cold. I would get to drink this giant coffee cup filled with creamy Hot Cocoa…you know the kind I mean…with the foam on the top from the giant melted marshmallow that used to be there. When you drank it, it was like your body was literally thawing out. There were parts of my body that were coming to life that I didn’t even realize were frozen.

My daughter became that for me…a sweet, warm, smiling example of that chocolaty goodness. And the real magic was…she made everyone feel that way. We all laughed and sang songs and smiled at everyone today.

All of this made me think about the saying…the reason for the season; it was like a light bulb came on. The reason for the season…is to give to others that in which we are given. It isn’t about video games or wish lists. It is about reflecting the love that God has given us…and sharing it with everyone else.

It may be true that we don’t have as much as the next person, but what we have is intended to be shared. I always try to remind others of our blessings, because we can get caught up in what we don’t have and we forget what we do have. We may not have tons of presents under the tree, and as true as that is…there will be people who do not have a home to put a tree in…never mind the presents underneath. We may not have a huge Christmas feast, but there are people who will not have food to eat on Christmas at all…or any other day. We will miss those we lost this year and our hearts may weep for them…but there are people who will spend this holiday all alone. Can you imagine living on this huge planet and feeling like you are all alone?

Today my daughter warmed our hearts…by simply opening hers. I hope it is an example that is set not in vain. Reach out for someone today, touch their hearts and don’t be afraid to warm their souls. God only asks that we give to others what HE has given to us…HIS LOVE. It costs nothing to love one another. If the only present you give to someone is your time…it is time well spent. Shine on one another…the reflection is that of our Creator.

 

**I actually wrote this last year…but I felt it beared repeating…Peace to you one and all

A Simple Blue Eyed Girl

A Simple Blue Eyed Girl

Sitting high above

I see you’re in pain

Wish I was there

To hold you again

But life does move on

Even when we aren’t ready

While your heart is stirred up

Your soul remains steady

For a birthday isn’t about life

Not when yours has ended

But about hearts that you touched

Broken fences you mended

And remember now and always

You mended my heart too

I was also blessed

The day God created you

I know you feel a loss

God knew that you would

But things have worked out

The way that they should

My eyes forever dance

My smile lives on forever

While our bodies are estranged

Our souls dance together

So cry not another tear

But you if you must…then smile

For as I was your gift

You made mine worthwhile

So sing our stories aloud

Show them love does exist

And if they don’t believe

I beg you to insist

For the true journey of life

Never ends in death for us

WE are forever bonded

In a circle of blood

So I thank God for the experience

Of having you to share

Never miss my life for I

Am with you …everywhere

Smile that glowing smile

And shine to the world

Signed forever with love

Just a simple blued eyed girl

**To My sister…may we all find the peace…that found you

Blessing In Disguise

Blessing In Disguise

Hello my dear heart

I came to talk to you today

To say I remember when

You came to feel this way

555 days ago today

We lost a kindred love

She was sent to watch over us

Somewhere high above

555 days ago this morning

We heard our phone ring

Never expecting the words

Would be ones which would sting

555 days ago this moment

Was a nightmare in the making

Never feeling anything close

To the way my heart was breaking

My dear heart I want to say

I also miss her too

Her smile…her laugh…her way

Of saying I LOVE YOU

Days seem to turn to years

In a moment in a flash

But that moment went on forever

How long can this last?

How long can such pain

Live within my heart’s heart

Sad about missed moments

Not knowing where to start

Where does a broken heart go

When it can not be repaired

For her passing seemed so wrong

Life can seem unfair

I know what some are thinking

How selfish I must be

To wish her back

From her divine eternity

I really can not explain it

Like running in place

I’m left now with a spot

Her forever space

Yes, she is still there

So my rambling may seem wrong

But the days go on forever

It just seems so wrong

I know that she loved me

I loved her just the same

But there is pain in the thought

Of no longer calling her name

This grief is unimagined

Not like a break up or a spat

My heart break is permanent

Happened in 555 days ago flat

Sisters have a bond

Most would fail to understand

Simply knowing through thick or thin

She will reach out for your hand

I admit I still reach out

Sometimes I even smile

At the mere idea that

I could see her for a while

Just to hug her tightly

To say I will be okay

That I will get past the next

555th day

My dear heart I don’t know

If you will ever be the same

But we will keep trying

In our Father’s name

Maybe some wounds

Are supposed to leave a scar

To remind us where we came from

To explain where we are

And where we are now

Is where we should be

Missing her presence

But remembering fondly

So even though you are broken

My dear heart try to remember this

She came along unexpectedly

One of God’s greatest Gifts

So tomorrow again we will smile

Blinking past tears from our eyes

For her life was my personal

Blessing in disguise

He Lifted Her Away

He Lifted Her Away

I watched as she left that day

I had often wondered where she went

To meet her lifelong friend

Every afternoon she had spent

Talking and laughing as

Young women often do

So I decided to follow

I wanted to join in too

She walked and walked

As I followed behind

She seemed to go forever

But she didn’t seem to mind

She finally stopped under

A huge old oak tree

As I hid and just listened

So she could not see

She laughed and talked

And spoke of remember when’s

Talking so much

That no one could jump in

And as the day slowly passed by

As the sun slowly began to set

She spoke of things which

I hadn’t heard about yet

I could hear her softly sobbing

As she began her next phrase

She began apologizing

I was truly amazed

She spoke of being sorry

For not listening when told

Of the way he hit her

How he had grown so bold

It’s not that I didn’t believe you

Or that I thought of you less

But I know now it was serious

I no longer have to guess

 

She spoke so quickly I thought

There was no time for response

She went talking about needs

And the things that she wants

I wasn’t a good friend then

We both know it’s true

I wished it had been different

I would know what to do

 

As I walked closer to reach

For her trembling hand

It all became clear

I finally understand

For this day like everyday

When she goes to spend time

It’s like turning back a page

Living in rewind

This one sided conversation

Had no choice from the start

For her friends name was written

On a polished rock

When she saw me she smiled

No one should have had to live this way

So God came and carried

And He lifted her away

**As a personal note…there are too many women who live with this everyday. Let us not add insult to injury by not stepping up on their behalf. **

Peace to you all